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Travail d'anglais

Dernière réponse : dans Etudes - Travail

Salut tout le monde. Est-ce que quelqu'un pourrait vérifier l'orthographe et la grammaire de mon texte pour un travail d'école. Merci d'avance...

Summary:
Mankind must reduce greenhouse gas emissions. A report made by scientists shows that the world would be uninhabitable in ten years.
The Amazon rainforest and the great Barrier Reef will be destroyed if we don’t do anything to save our planet.
The rising greenhouses gases will disrupt seasons: Summers will be very hot and winters will be wet and stormy in some regions of Europe.
There will be migrations from all around the world.
Luckily for us, for the moment, a big part of carbon dioxide is absorbed by forest and oceans.
Mankind must keep gas emissions under control. Before 2015, populations all around the world must reduce carbon emissions at around 3 per cent a year if we want to survive, otherwise in one year it will be too late.

Comment:
The ice caps melt proves that the situation is alarming.
I know that the Kyoto treaty wants to tackle this problem but some industrial powers, like America won’t do anything. The republicans will never endorse anything that would take money out of their pockets, regardless of the consequences.
Nobody thinks about the next generations, but I think that we should think about our children who deserve to have the same living condition as we have.
I think that everyone should plant a tree, it will store carbon dioxide that would otherwise be in the atmosphere.
People should invest in alternative energy devices, for example solar energy can be a great source of electricity in sunny countries.

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Citation :
the world would be uninhabitable


If I were you... heuu, pardon, si j'étais toi, je mettrais plutôt:

"the world will be uninhabitable" surtout qu'après tu ne dis plus "serait", mais "sera". Je pens qu'il faudrais suivre la même logique. En plus, çà a plus d'impact de dire "le monde sera" plutôt que "le monde serait".

Sinon c'est nickel crhome !^^

Rien à redire si ce n'est:

Citation :
want to survive, otherwise in one year it will be too late.


Je mettrais plutôt: "want to survive, otherwise, in one year, it will be too late."

Ca isole plus le "too late" et oblige le lecteur à bein s'atarder et donc, bien lire le passage.

Voilà, vraiment très bon travail, si j'étais prof d'Anglais, j'aimerais t'avoir comme élève ! ^^

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