Aide sur l'expression écrite en anglais

Bonjour à tous, je viens demander de l'aide ou plutôt des corrections sur mes thèmes d'expression écrites en anglais.

Premier sujet : Should the death penalty be abolished ?

Should a person who commits a brutal crime be punished with death ?
After considering the pros and cons, i believe the death penalty should be a legal option in the criminal justice system, but there is the option for the defendant to be sentenced to life imprisonment.
First, it is deterrent to crime. Statistics have shown that states who do not have the death penalty have a hight number of capital crimes.
A second advantage of the death penalty is that the victim’s family has peace of mind when they know the killer can never murder again.
For the most brutal crimes, the death penalty is appropriate. It is the only way we can prevent dangerous criminals from committing another violent crime.

The abolitionists have an argument, the fear of being given the death penalty isn’t effective for the serial killers or mental patients, because nothing can fear them.
Moreover, no one, including a judge is perfect. What happens if a person is given capital punishment and evidence turns up later which reveals that this person is innocent ? If the « criminal » was put in jail, at least partial reparations could be made later. Obviously, if a person is given the death penalty, there is no turning back.
For example, a man was jailed for murdering a social worker although he claimed that he was innocent. Here, a journalist proved that mistakes can be made by juries because the man could solve the crime from his prison cell.

To conclude, it is not fair that murderers are often given parole after only a few years in jail. That is the reason that I would suggest those convicted of murder should be jailed for life with no option for parole, and all countries in the world should abolish the death penalty like in France, where The French Parliament registered the abolition of the death penalty in the Constitution.

Voilà c'est mon premier sujet sur la peine de mort, j'aimerais savoir si je n'ai pas fait trop de faute ou si vous pouviez me corriger.

Deuxième sujet : adoption by homosexuals

In my opinion, adoption by homosexuals is a subject of controversy in many countries, like in France where the partner of a natural mother has not been allowed to adopt his child by the supreme court of appeal. Indeed, recently a woman has not been allowed to adopt her girlfriend’s child. Others countries like the Netherlands, the United Kingdom or Sweden have grant the right to adopt. The possibility of adopting is done according to some selection criteria which are educational qualities and a good environment for the child. The homosexuality question isn’t mentioned, that’s why all this countries allow the adoption. Indeed, if we refuse the right to adopt for homosexual couples, that means to discriminate them, people don’t accept the fact that two people of the same sex can love each other. However, there are large number of reasons against adoption which are upholded by the Church and the Pope. Indeed, it’s against the teaching of the Catholic Church. The Catholic Church doesn’t want gay couples to adopt children. Moreover, since adoption by homosexual couples, goes against the teaching of the Catholic Church, the latter does not want to abide by the former. Homosexuality has an unnatural aspect because biologically, a man and a woman are necessary to conceive a child and, it appears unusual to consider a homosexual filiation or a homoparentality. Moreover, we don’t know which are the consequences for children, if homosexual couples are a danger in their evolution and in particular in psychological evolution. Although the child can understand the situation, it can be difficult for him to integrate people, his origin can be a problem and become a difficulty in public relations.


Troisème sujet : Donner son opinion sur le téléchargement illegal

It seems that music companies claims that illegal download will kill the industry and artists claims they are deprives them of their royalties. A family who was caught for download will have to pay a hefty fine. And, if parents had refused to pay compensation to record companies, they would have been persecuted. Parents prefer to pay compensation rather than go to court. Today, music companies see declining revenues and increasing bootlegging (illicit recording) and demands the law enforcement respond. But, if records were cheaper, young people wouldn’t download will kill the industry, downloads have dramatically revived it. The music industry has not recognized the market has changed.
In order to put and end to illegal downloading, we can imagine that a fine could be a solution. If the fine is personally addressed to young people, may be it can deters them to pursue this activity. During a discussion of methods to frustrate computer users who illegally exchange music and movie files over the internet, music companies asked technology executives about ways to damage computers involved in such file trading. Legal experts have said any such attack would violate federal anti-hacking laws.
The rights of copyrights holders need to be protected, but some draconian remedies that have been suggested would create more problems than they would solve.
To conclude, fines and civil lawsuits against illegal downloading are ineffective, moreover law making downloading illegal is ineffective is that a downloader has no way of knowing what music is legal and what is copyrighted. Governments can try to enforce laws against downloading but realistically the only effective regulations are against uploaders.

Voilà, je vous remercie, j'espère que vous pourrez m'aider car je ne suis vraiment pas doué en anglais après toutes ces années.