correction anglais redaction important merci
Dernière réponse : dans Etudes - Travail
Bonjour , j'ai beaucoup de soucis en anglais étant que c'est la première année que je fais anglais au lycee . j'aimerais que vous corriger mes fautes de gramm et ortho ! merci d'avance
mac is 42 years old. He is a Dalit and he is an activist. He spent his time to fight about the dalits right. he is a leader. Mac works in 1981 in his native village.
When he studies , he was miserable because he must clean the room and for this time the other plays.
When he was 12 years old, he work is a farm.Thus he go to went studies of psychology and law. He goes in the university.
Mac backgroun is very poor ! he said that he had never breakfast when he was in the college. The money that he have , it is for his familly. He has a very difficult childhood.
Trought Mac caracters is brilliant . he is a man who fight for the india rights and he overcome the difficulty. He doesn't baisser les bras.
He is intelligent and he thinks good . He is not a hypocrite and he think for the others people . this man doesn't overlook his eyes for this reality.
MERI D AVANCE
mac is 42 years old. He is a Dalit and he is an activist. He spent his time to fight about the dalits right. he is a leader. Mac works in 1981 in his native village.
When he studies , he was miserable because he must clean the room and for this time the other plays.
When he was 12 years old, he work is a farm.Thus he go to went studies of psychology and law. He goes in the university.
Mac backgroun is very poor ! he said that he had never breakfast when he was in the college. The money that he have , it is for his familly. He has a very difficult childhood.
Trought Mac caracters is brilliant . he is a man who fight for the india rights and he overcome the difficulty. He doesn't baisser les bras.
He is intelligent and he thinks good . He is not a hypocrite and he think for the others people . this man doesn't overlook his eyes for this reality.
MERI D AVANCE
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Mac is 42 years old, he is a Dalit and an activist. He spends his time fighting for the Dalit Rights. He is a leader. Mac has been working since 1981 in his native village.
When he studied he was miserable beacause he mostly cleaned the room meanwhile the others play.
When he xas 12 years old he worked in a farm. He went to college (ou university) and studied psychology and law.
Mac background is very poor! He never had breakfast when he was in college. The money he had was for his family. He had a very difficult childhood.
Though Mac caracter is brilliant. He is a man who fights for the Indian Rights and the overcomes difficulties. He doesn't give up.
He is intelligent and thinks right. He is not a hypocrite and he thinks for the others
Remarques :
1) 3eme personne du singulier indicatif présent : toujours un s a la fin
2) attention a la concordance des temps -passé -présent
3) Clareté du texte !
When he studied he was miserable beacause he mostly cleaned the room meanwhile the others play.
When he xas 12 years old he worked in a farm. He went to college (ou university) and studied psychology and law.
Mac background is very poor! He never had breakfast when he was in college. The money he had was for his family. He had a very difficult childhood.
Though Mac caracter is brilliant. He is a man who fights for the Indian Rights and the overcomes difficulties. He doesn't give up.
He is intelligent and thinks right. He is not a hypocrite and he thinks for the others
Remarques :
1) 3eme personne du singulier indicatif présent : toujours un s a la fin
2) attention a la concordance des temps -passé -présent
3) Clareté du texte !
redaction d'anglais ! pouvez vou me corriger please !
sujet : ecrire une histoir d'amour au passé en decrivan les perso principaux.
In 200O, Luna was 16 years old. She was a really pretty Young woman. Indeed, she was so popular in her hight school. She was tall and slim. She had got long curly Brown hair and blue eyes. Whereas Léa, her best friend, she didn’t like new technologie or fashion like lots of girls. Besides, she didn’t interrested by boys. Actually, she was fond of horses, she started to practice horse back riding 10 years ago. She lived in a house with her mother in a suburbs of New-York.
A morning, more precisely, the morning of Luna’s Birthday, Léa came to her house to wish her a happy birthday and also to tell her to follow her beacause she had a special present. A few minutes after, the girls went outside and Luna followed her best friend. They were walking, Luna was asking Léa lots of question when they, finally, arrived in a stud farm.
Léa pointed to a horse and said : « This one is for you » ! Luna screamed ans thanked his best friend a million times. A lad-jockey was walking toward the girls with the wonderful present. Luna and the boy saw each other and they loved at first sight. They were talking to each other a long time ans, Luna learned his name was Ruben, he was spanish. Nevertheless Léa was growing impatient so the girls decided to leave with the horse.
During a mounth, Luna was think.ing about Ruben… They was sure, if there is only one true, perfect person for each person, he was him. Even if she was shy, she decided to go again in the farm to see him again. However, he wasn’t here. She asked some workers but no body knowed where was he going. Luna, sadly, went back in home.
In a party, she saw it again. They were geting on with each other, talking, dancing, having fun. Ruben confessed wich he fall in love with Luna the first time she saw her.
Two years later, Luna relocate in Ruben’s flat in N-Y. And they loved each other for ever.
sujet : ecrire une histoir d'amour au passé en decrivan les perso principaux.
In 200O, Luna was 16 years old. She was a really pretty Young woman. Indeed, she was so popular in her hight school. She was tall and slim. She had got long curly Brown hair and blue eyes. Whereas Léa, her best friend, she didn’t like new technologie or fashion like lots of girls. Besides, she didn’t interrested by boys. Actually, she was fond of horses, she started to practice horse back riding 10 years ago. She lived in a house with her mother in a suburbs of New-York.
A morning, more precisely, the morning of Luna’s Birthday, Léa came to her house to wish her a happy birthday and also to tell her to follow her beacause she had a special present. A few minutes after, the girls went outside and Luna followed her best friend. They were walking, Luna was asking Léa lots of question when they, finally, arrived in a stud farm.
Léa pointed to a horse and said : « This one is for you » ! Luna screamed ans thanked his best friend a million times. A lad-jockey was walking toward the girls with the wonderful present. Luna and the boy saw each other and they loved at first sight. They were talking to each other a long time ans, Luna learned his name was Ruben, he was spanish. Nevertheless Léa was growing impatient so the girls decided to leave with the horse.
During a mounth, Luna was think.ing about Ruben… They was sure, if there is only one true, perfect person for each person, he was him. Even if she was shy, she decided to go again in the farm to see him again. However, he wasn’t here. She asked some workers but no body knowed where was he going. Luna, sadly, went back in home.
In a party, she saw it again. They were geting on with each other, talking, dancing, having fun. Ruben confessed wich he fall in love with Luna the first time she saw her.
Two years later, Luna relocate in Ruben’s flat in N-Y. And they loved each other for ever.
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